Fresh off of a slightly unoriginal April Fools gag, Palworld, that thing everyone couldn’t stop talking about before they couldn’t stop talking about Helldivers 2 has just recieved a fresh update. While the big thing is the arrival of the game’s first raid boss, the patch’ll also let you further embrace your own evil bossdom.
Yes, forget about Bellanoir, the goth girl raid boss who can now be summoned via new altars and even comes with an extreme version that’s “incredibly powerful and difficult to defeat”, it’s time of Pocketpair to find new ways to let you mistreat your pals in a fashion that’s finging on biting satire. Hey, the game might suffer from a lack of originality, but at least it’s finding ways to innovate in terms of Pal misery.
In the novel-length notes for update v0.2.0.6, which has already been pushed out on Steam and should be coming to Xbox soon, you can read all about the new raids, which will basically see you battle some fresh foes that cant’t be captured, but do have a chance of dropping pal eggs when you dispatch them. There are also a bunch of new items that’ve been added to the game alongside this, including training manuals that can give pals experience points, “Ability Glasses” that’ll let you see a pal’s stats, and a “Homeward Thundercloud” that can instantly teleport you to your nearest home base.
There are even some new buildings and gear, such as an undershirt that wards off all temperatures, an electric egg incubator and an ore mining site for your base. But we’re not here for any of that, are we? We want pure, uncut cruelty, and a change that defintely delivers is the fact “you can now force a Pal to work and cancel their break by picking them up and throwing them towards a facility”. Yes. If you’re prepared to sacrifice their recovery time, you can literally chuck your workforce back onto the factory floor.
If it wasn’t just Pokemon with guns, I’d be tempted to say Palworld might be on par with the GTA series satire-wise at this point. You can also now force your pals into certain careers by disallowing certain types of work for them via the monitoring stand. Again, no real world comparisons to be made here.
Aside from a tweak that means “items dropped by players after death on a dedicated server can now be picked up by anyone after 24 hours of real-time have passed”, the majority of the other inclusions are the usual bug fixes, minor revamps, and balancing adjustments.
Oh, and Pocketpair says it’s “planning a larger, more content-packed update for summer 2024” which’ll include “a new island, home to many new pals” and some fresh “buildings, weapons, and tower bosses”.
So, there’s your summer holidays sorted, assuming you actually still care about Palworld any more.